08. WALIDAIN KI NAFARMAANI [Disrespect to Parents]
Waldain ki nafarmani
Allah Tala ne farmaya:
وَقَضٰى رَبُّكَ اَلَّا تَعۡبُدُوۡۤا اِلَّاۤ اِيَّاهُ وَبِالۡوَالِدَيۡنِ اِحۡسَانًا. (الاسراء 23:18)
“Aur tumhare Rab ne faisla kar diya hai, keh tum us kay siwa kisi ki ibadat na karo aur Waldain kay sath husn e sulooq se paish aao”.
اِمَّا يَـبۡلُغَنَّ عِنۡدَكَ الۡكِبَرَ اَحَدُهُمَاۤ اَوۡ كِلٰهُمَا فَلَا تَقُلْ لَّهُمَاۤ اُفٍّ وَّلَا تَنۡهَرۡهُمَا. (الاسراء 23:18)
“Agar tumhari moujoodgi mein un mein se aik ya donon burhape ko punchen tou tum un ko uff tak na kaho aur na hi un ko jhirko“.
Ya’ani jab wo donon boorhe aur umar raseed hojaen tou un se baat karte waqt uktahat aur tanggi ka sa andaz ikhtyar na karo aur jis tarah un donon ne teri khidmat ko apne zimme liya tha, issi tarah munasib yahi hai keh tum un donon ki khidmat ko apne zimme le lo. Halankeh fazeelat tou paish qadmi aur sabqat karne walon ko hasil hoti hai. Ye brabari kaise ho sakti hai, jab keh wo tou tumhari Zindagi ki umeed par tumhari takleefen bardasht karte rahe aur tumhari halat ye hai keh agar tum ne un donon ki takleef bardash bhi ki tou tum un donon ki mout ki umeed karte ho. Phir Allah Tala ne farmaya:
وَقُلْ لَّهُمَا قَوۡلًا كَرِيۡمًا ۞ وَاخۡفِضۡ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحۡمَةِ وَقُلْ رَّبِّ ارۡحَمۡهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيٰنِىۡ صَغِيۡرًا ۞ (بني إسرائيل:18;23-24)
“Aur un se narmi se baat karo, shafqat Dua Aajzi ka pehlo un kay aage jhukao aur un kay haq mein Dua karo. Ae Rab! Jis tarah un donon ne bachpan mein mujhe pala hai, issi tarah to bhi un par Raham farma”.
Aur Allah Tala ne farmaya:
اَنِ اشۡكُرۡ لِىۡ وَلِـوَالِدَيۡكَؕ اِلَىَّ الۡمَصِيۡرُ ۞
(لقمان 14:41)
“Ye keh tum meri aur apne Waldain ki shukar guzari karo, Meri hi taraf tum ko lout kar ana hai.”
Allah tum par Raham farmae, zara dekho keh Allah ne un donon ki shukar guzari ko kis tarah apni shukar guzari kay sath bayan farmaya hai.
Ibn-e-Abbas رضى الله عنها ne farmaya: teen Ayat, teen cheezon kay sath mili hoi nazil hoi hain. Un se aik’ dosri kay bagher qubool nahi ki jati.
Allah Tala ne farmaya:
(اطيعو الله و اطيعوا الرسول)
“Allah aur Rasool ki Ita’at karo”.
Pas jis shakhs ne Allah ki Ita’at ki lekin Rasool ki Ita’at na ki tou wo bhi us se qubool nahi ki jaegi.
ب. (واقيموا الصلوة وآتو الزكاة)
“Namaz qaim karo aur Zakaat ada karo”
Pas jo shakhs Namaz parhe aur Zakaat na kare tou us ki Namaz bhi qubool nahi.
ج. Allah Tala ne farmaya:
(أن اشكر لي ولوالديك)
“Ye keh Meri aur apne Waldain ki shukar guzari karo” pas jo shakhs Allah ka shukar ada kare, lekin apne Waldain ka Shukar ada na kare, tou us se Allah ki shukar guzari bhi qubool nahi ki jaegi.
Issi liye Nabi ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Allah ki Razamandi, Waldain ki Razamandi mein hai aur Allah ki narazi Waldain ki narazi mein hai”.
[Imam Tirmizi ne usse Abdullah bin Umar se riwayat kiya hai aur us kay moqoof hone ko tarjeeh di hai aur Imam Hakim ne farmaya ye Sahih Muslim ki shart par sahih hai.]
Ibne Amr رضي الله عنه bayan karte hain: ek aadmi Nabi ﷺ se, apki ma’iyat mein jihad par Jane ki ijazat talab karne kay lie hazir hua tou Nabi ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Kia tumhare walidain zindah hain?”
Us ne arz kia: ji han, ap ne farmaya:
“Pas un dono ki khidmat mein jihad karo” [Bukhari: 3004; Muslim: 3549]
Zara dekhen keh walidain se husne sulook aur unki khidmat ko kis tarah jihad par fazeelat di gai hai
Aur RasullAllah ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Kia main tumhen kabeera gunahon kay muta’alliq na bataun?”
…… Allah kay Sath shareek thehrana aur walidain ki nafarmani karna ” [Bukhari: 6920]
Ap Zara ghaur farmaen keh un donon kay Sath Bure sulook aur un se naiki aur ehsan na karne ka kis tarah shareek thehrane kay Sath zikar kia gaya hai
Ek aur riwayat hai keh RasullAllah ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Walidain ka nafarman, ehsan jaltlane wala aur aadi sharab nosh jannat mein nahin jaenge” [Ahmed: 134/2]
Aur Aap ﷺ se marwi hai:
Agar Allah kay ilm mein (Allah ka ilm yaqeenan kamilo mukammal hai), uff se bhi adna koi lafz hota tou woh usse bhi Mana farma deta, pas walidain ka nafarman Jo chahe Amal karta rahe woh jannat mein dakhil nahin hoga aur walidain se husne sulook karne Wala Jo chahe Amal karta rahe woh Jahannum mein nahin jaega”
Aur Aap ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Allah ne apne walidain ki nafarmani karne wale par la’anat farmai hai” [ Mustadrik Hakim: 153/4]
Aur aap ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Allah us shakhs par la’anat farmae Jo apne walid ko gali deta hai aur Allah us shakhs par la’anat farmae Jo apni walidah ko gaali deta hai” [Ibne Hibban]
1-. Welmi ne ahram bin hoshab ki hadith se bisanadihi ilaa Hussain bin Ali riwayat kia hai jab keh ahram kazzab hai as suyooti ne ise zail allai mein zikar kia hai
“Allah tamam gunahon mein se jo chahta hai, Roz-e-Qayamat tak mu’akhar rakhta hai ba-juz walidain ki nafarmani kay kyun keh woh ese shakhs ko jaldi Dunia mein saza deta hai ” [Mustadrik Hakim]
Ka’ab ahbaar ne farmaya: yaqeenan Allah bande ko jald halak kar deta hai jab woh apne walidain ka nafarman ho, taakeh woh use jald azab se do chaar kar de aur Allah bande ki Umar daraz farmata hai jab woh apne walidain se husne sulook karta ho, taakeh woh usko naiki aur kahiro bhalai mein mazeed barha de aur unse husne sulook ka ek pehlu ye bhi hai keh jab unhen zarurat ho tou un par kharch kia jae
Ek aadmi Nabi ﷺ ki khidmat mein hazir hua tou us ne arz kia: Allah kay Rasul! Mere walid chahte hain keh woh mere maal ko apni kisi zarurat Puri karne mein sarf karen , tou aap ﷺ ne farmaya: “Tum aur tumhara maal tumhare baap ka hai”
Ka’ab bin ahbaar se walidain ki nafarmani kay muta’alliq pucha gaya keh isse kia Murad hai? Unhon ne farmaya: jab uska walid ya uski walidah us par qasam kha le tou woh unki qasam ko pura na kare, jab woh usse koi cheez mangen tou woh unhen na de aur jab woh us kay pas koi amanat rakhen tou woh unse khiyanat kare
Ibne Abbas رضي الله عنهما se ashaabe A’araaf kay muta’alliq pucha gaya keh woh kon hain aur A’araaf kia hai? Unhon ne farmaya: Jahan tak A’araaf ka ta’alluq hai tou woh jannat aur Jahannum kay darmian ek Pahar hai, uska nam A’araaf islie hai keh woh jannat aur Jahannum se buland hai, us par darakht, phal, nehren aur chashme hain, aur rahe woh aadmi Jo us par honge, yeh woh log honge Jo apne
Walidain ki razamandi kay bagher jihad mein gae aur jihad mein shaheed kar die gae, Allah ki raah mein shaheed hone kay Amal ne unhen Jahannum mein Jane se rok rakha aur walidain ki nafarmani ne unhen jannat mein Jane se rok rakha, pas jab tak Allah in kay baare mein faisla nahin farmaega woh A’araaf par hi rahenge [Saeed bin Mansoor ne apni Sunan mein ise riwayat kia hai]
Ek aadmi RasullAllah ﷺ ki khidmat mein hazir hua tou us ne arz kia: Allah kay Rasul! Logon mein se mere husne sulook ka sab se ziada haqdar kon hai? Aap ne farmaya: “Teri walidah “
Us ne arz kia phir kon? Aap ne farmaya: “Teri walidah”
Us ne arz kia phir kon? Aap ne farmaya: “Teri walidah”
Us ne arz kia phir kon? Aap ne farmaya: “Tera walid”
Phir usse qareeb tar aur phir usse qareeb tar ” [ Bukhari]
Pas aap ne walidah se husne sulook kay baare mein 3 martabah aur walid se husne sulook kay baare mein ek martabah targheeb farmai aur yeh mehez islie hai keh us ne takleefo mushaqat ziada bardasht karne kay Sath shafqat bhi ziada ki hoti hai, is kay elawa Hamal, darde zeh , wiladat , raza’at aur raaton ko jagne ki takaleef bardasht karti hai
Ibne Umr رضي الله عنه ne ek aadmi ko dekha keh us ne apni walidah ko apne kandhon par uthaya hua hai aur use ka’abe ka tawaf Kara raha hai, us ne kaha: Ibne Umar! Tumhara kia khayal hai keh main ne ise badla dedia hai? Unhon ne farmaya: nahin, is ne darde zeh ki Jo takleefen bardasht ki hen, abhi tou us ek dard ka badla nahin hua lekin Tum ne bohot acha kia aur Allah ta’ala tumhen thore Amal par bohot ziadah ajr-o-sawab ataa farmaega
Abu Hurairah رضي الله عنه bayan karte hain RasullAllah ﷺ ne farmaya:
“4 aadmion ka Allah par Haq hai keh woh unhen jannat mein dakhil kare , na unhen uski nai’maten chakhae, aadi sharab nosh, Sood khor, Nahaq taur par yateem ka maal khane wala aur apne walidain ka nafarman , illah yeh keh woh tauba kar len
Ek aadmi Abu Dardaa رضي الله عنه kay pas aya tou us ne kaha: Abu Dardaa! Main ne ek aurat se shadi ki hai jab keh Meri walidah mujhe use talaq dene ka hukum deti hai. Abu Dardaa رضي الله عنه ne kaha: main ne RasullAllah ﷺ ko farmate hue suna :
“Walid, abwabe jannat ka darmiana darwaza hai, agar tum chaho tou us darwaze ko zaya kardo ya usko mehfuz karlo” [Ibne Majah; Tirmidhi]
Aur aap ﷺ ne farmaya:
“3 duaen aisi hain jin kay qubul hone mein koi shak nahin, mazloom ki dia, musafir ki Dua aur walid ki apne bache kay lie bad Dua” [Mundhiri ne ise Tirmidhi ki taraf mansub kia hai]
Aur aap ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Khala, maan kay maqamo manzilat par hai, ya’ani husne sulook, ikraam, silah rehmi aur ehsan karne kay lihaz se” [Tirmidhi: 1904]
Wahab bin munabbah bayan karte hain:
Allah ta’ala ne Musa عليه السلام ko wahi ki: Musa! Apne walidain ki izzato tauqeer kar, kyun keh jo shakhs apne walidain ki izzato tauqeer karta hai tou main uski Umar daraz kar deta hun aur use aisa bacha ataa karta hun Jo uski izzato tauqeer karta hai aur jo shakhs apne walidain ki nafarmani karta hai tou main uski Umar Kam kardeta hun aur use aisa bacha ataa karta hun Jo uski nafarmani karta hai
Abu Bakr bin Abi Mariam bayan karte hain: main ne taurat mein parha hai keh jo shakhs apne walid ko Marta hai use qatal kia jaega aur wahab ne farmaya: Main ne taurat mein parha hai jo shakhs walid ko maare tou use rajam kia jaega
Amr bin Murrah juhni bayan karte hain, ek aadmi RasullAllah ﷺ ki khidmat mein hazir hua tou us ne arz kia: Allah kay Rasul! Mujhe bataen keh jab mein paanchon namazen parhun,
Ramzan kay roze rakhun, zakat adaa karun aur baitullah ka Hajj karun tou mujhe kia milega? RasullAllah ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Jo shakhs ye aa’mal baja lae tou woh anbia’ عليهم السلام , siddiqeen, shuhada aur saliheen kay Sath hoga bashart yeh keh apne walidain ka nafarman na ho” [Musnad Ahmed; Tabrani]
Aur Aap ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Allah ne walidain kay nafarman par la’anat farmai hai” [Imam Zahabi ne ise “as sughra” mein riwayat kia hai]
RasullAllah ﷺ ne farmaya:
“Jab mujhe mairaj karai gai tou main ne us rat kuch logon ko aag kay tane kay Sath latke hue Jahannum mein dekha , tou main ne pucha: Jibrael! Yeh kon log hain? Unhon ne kaha: Jo Dunia mein apne walidain ko gaali dia karte the
Marwi hai keh jo shakhs apne walidain ko gaali deta hai, tou aasman se zameen par utarne wali Barish kay har qatre kay ewaz uski qabar mein aag ka ek Angara utarta hai, riwayat kia jata hai keh jab apne walidain kay kisi nafarman shakhs ko dafan kia jata hai tou uski qabar use khoob dabati hai tou us mein uski paslian ek dusri mein dakhil ho jati hain aur Roz-e-Qayamat 3 qisam kay logon ko Rabb se Sakht azab dia jaega: Mushrik, zaani aur apne walidain ka nafarman shakhs
Bashar ne kaha: Jo shakhs apni walidah kay is qadar qareeb rehta hai Jahan se uski baat sun sake, tou yeh us shakhs se afzalo behtar hai Jo apni talwar se Allah ki raah mein qitaal karta hai aur us (walidah) ki taraf dekh lena har cheez se Afzal hai
Ek aadmi aur ek aurat apne bache kay baare mein jhagarte hue RasullAllah ﷺ ki khidmat mein hazir hue tou aadmi ne kaha: Allah kay Rasul! Mera bacha (nutfe ki surat mein) Meri pusht se nikla hai, aurat ne kaha: Allah kay Rasul! Us ne khafeef Andaz mein isko Uthaya aur shehwat se use rakha (tapkaya) jab keh main ne takleef se use uthaya, takleef se use Janam dia aur do saal mukammal use dudh pilaya, pas RasullAllah ﷺ ne uska faisla us (bache) ki maan kay Haq mein kia [Ahmed; Abu Dawood]
Naseehat:
Pukhta aur takeedi huqooq ko zaya karne wale! Walidain se husne sulook kay ewaz unki nafarmani karne wale! Apne wajibat kay bhuk Jane wale! Apne anjaam se ghafil hone wale! Walidain se husne sulook se paish ana Tum par ek qarz hai, jab keh tu uski taraf Bure Andaz mein paish qadmi karta hai, Tum apne zu’am mein jannat kay talabgar ho , halan keh woh tumhari maan kay qadmon tale hai , us ne tumhen 9 maah apne pait mein utha rakha Goya keh woh 9 saal the, aur paidaish kay waqt khoono Dil pighla dene wali takleefen bardasht kin , us ne apne pistanon ne tujhe dudh pilaya , Teri khatir apni rat ki neenden Haram kin apne daaen hath se Teri ghalazat saaf ki , aur ghiza kay maamle mein apni nisbat tujhe tarjeeh di, uski gaud tere lie gehwara bani rahi, Tujhe ehsan aur a’aanat faraham ki, agar tujhe koi beemari ya takleef pohonchti tou woh intihai gham aur pareshani ka shikar hojati aur uska huzno gham aur siskian daraz ho jati aur woh apna maal tabeeb kay lie hazir kar deti, agar use Teri Zindagi aur apni maut mein se kisi ek ka ikhtiyar dia gaya tou us ne baa awaze buland Teri Zindagi talab ki , us kay bawajud tu ne kitni bar us se bad akhlaqi ki , lekin us ne hamesha tere lie kamiabo Kamrani ki posheedah (ahista) aur ailania duaen kin, lekin jab burhape mein woh Teri mohtaj hui tou tu ne use apne lie tamam cheezon se ma’muli samjha , tu khud tou sair ho kar khata aur woh bhuki rehti, tu khud sairab hota aur woh kisi cheez ka mutalibah kie bagher mutmain rehti, tu ne ehsan karne mein ehlo ayal ko us par tarjeeh di, tu ne us kay ehsanat ko faramosh kardia, uska maamla tere han mushkil hogaya halan keh wo asan hai, uski Umar tujh par daraz Hogai, halan keh woh mukhtasar hai, tu ne uska aur us kay huqooq ka khayal na rakha halan keh tere Siwa uska koi madadgar nahin, jab keh tere Malik ne tujhe uff kehne se bhi Mana farmaya hai aur us kay huqooq ka khayal na rakhne par us ne tumhen halki si saza di hai, Dunia mein tumhen is tarah ki saza di jaegi keh Teri aulad Teri nafarmani karegi aur akhirat mein tujhe Rabbul aalameen ka qurb naseeb nahin hoga aur dant kay Andaz mein use awaz di jaegi:
ذلِكَ بِمَا قَدَّمَتْ يَدَكَ وَأَنَّ اللهَ لَيسَ بِظَلَّامٍ لِلْعَبِيدِ۞
“Yeh un aa’mal ki saza hai Jo tu ne aage bheje the, Allah apne bandon par hargiz zulm nahin karta”
(Al Hajj 22:10)
لأمك حق لو علمت كثير
كثيرك يا هذا لديه يسير
فكم ليلة بانت بتقلك تشتكي
لها من جواها أنة وزفير
وفى الوضع لو تدرى عليها مشقة
فمن غصص منها الفؤاد يطير
وكم غسلت عنك الأذى بيمينها
وما حجرها إلا لديك سرير
وتفديك مما تشتكيه بنفسها
ومن لديها شرب لديك نمير
وكم مرة جاعت و أعطتك قوتها
حنانا و اشفاقا وأنت صغير
فاها الذي عقل و يتبع الهوى
وأنها لأعمى القلب وهو بصير
فدونك فارغب في عميم دعاتها
فانت لما تدعو إليه فقير
“Agar tu Jane tou Teri maan ka bohot Haq hai , ae fulan tera bohot bhi us kay haan ma’muli hai”
“Tere siqal ki wajah se us ne kitni raaten takleef mein guzari, us takleef ki wajah se woh karahti aur lambi lambi saansen leti rahi”
“Agar tu jaan le keh paidaish kay waqt us par kia guzri, uski ba’az takleef se Dil urne lagta hai”
“Woh Teri takleef par apni jaan qurban karne tak jati, aur us kay pistanon se tere
Lie khalis sharab hazir thi”
“Aur kitni martabah us ne khud bhuka reh kar tujhe khorak di, aur tujh par shafqato meherbani ki jab keh tu chota tha”
“Us aqalmand par afsos hai jo khuwahishat ki itteba’ karta hai, us ankhon wale par afsos hai jo Dil ka andha hai”
“Tum uski umoomi duaon mein raghbat rakho, pas Tum bhi Dua karo, Tum tou uski taraf mohtaj ho”
Hikayat hai keh Nabi ﷺ kay daur mein alqamah naami ek nojawan tha, woh namaz roze aur sadqe kay baare mein Allah ta’ala ki bohot ita’at karta tha, pas woh beemar ho gaya aur uska marz shiddat ikhtiyar kar gaya, tou uski aurat ne RasullAllah ﷺ ki taraf paigham bheja keh Mera khawand alqamah naza’ ki halat mein hai, islie Allah kay Rasul! Main ne us kay muta’alliq apko batane ka iradah kia, pas Nabi ﷺ ne Ammar, Sohaib aur Bilal رضي الله عنهم ko bheja aur farmaya:
“Us kay pas chale Jao aur use kalimahe shahadat parhne ki talqeen karo, pas woh uski taraf chal die, us kay pas pohonche tou usko naza’ ki halat mein paya tou woh usko laa ilaha illallah ki talqeen karne lage , lekin uski zaban se yeh alfaz adaa nahin ho rahe the, pas unhon ne RasullAllah ﷺ ko batane kay lie keh uski zaban se laa ilaha illallah kay alfaz jaari nahin ho rahe , aadmi Bheja tou Nabi ﷺ ne farmaya: kia us kay walidain mein se koi zindah hai? Arz kia gaya: Allah kay Rasul! Burhi walidah hai
RasullAllah ﷺ ne uski taraf paigham bheja aur qasid se farmaya:
Use kehna keh agar woh RasullAllah ﷺ ki taraf Jane ki qudrat rakhti hai tou theek warna woh Ghar mein rahe hatta keh woh khud ap kay pas tashreef le aate hain”
Rawi bayan karte hain:
Qasid us kay pas aya aur RasulAllah (ﷺ) ka farman use bataya tou us ne kaha:
Meri jaan un par qurban ho, unki khidmat mein Jana mere ziada Haq hai, pas woh laathi kay sahare RasullAllah ﷺ ki khidmat mein hazir hui Salam kia, tou aap ﷺ ne Salam ka jawab dia
Aur usse farmaya:
“Umme Alqamah ! Mujh se sachi baat karna ! Agar tum ne jhoot bola tou Allah Tala ki taraf se mujhe Wahi ajaegi. Tere bete Alqamah ka kia haal tha? Us ne arz kiya: Allah kay Rasool ! Bohat ziyada Namazen parhne wala, bohat ziyada roze rakhne wala aur bohat ziyada sadqa karne wale. Rasool Allah ﷺ ne farmaya: tumhara kia haal hai?
” Us ne arz kiya, Allah kay Rasool! Main us se naraz hon” Ap ne pocha: kyun? Us ne arz kiya Allah kay Rasool! Wo apni biwi ko tarjeeh deta tha aur Meri nafarmani kiya karta tha. Rasool Allah ﷺ ne farmaya: agar Alqamah ki maa naraz hai tou phir Alqamah ki zaban se kalima e shahadat jaari nahi ho sakta”. Phir farmaya:
“Bilal ! Jao aur bohat si lakriyan le kar aao”. Us ( maa ) ne kaha: Allah kay Rasool! Ap kia karenge? Ap ne farmaya: Main isse tumhare samne aag se jalaonga”. Us ne arz kiya: Allah kay Rasool ! Mera beta, mera Dil bardasht nahi kar sakta, keh Ap usse mere samne aag se jala den.
Ap ne farmaya: “Umme Alqamah! Allah ka azab ziyada shadeed aur baqi rehne wala hai. Agar tum chahti ho keh Allah usse maaf kare tou phir us se raazi hojao. Us zaat ki qasam jis kay hath mein Meri jan hai! Jab tak tum us se naraz ho, Alqamah ki Namaz, roza aur us ka sadqa karna, us kay kuch kaam nahi aega”. Us ne arz kiya: Allah kay Rasool ! Main Allah Tala kay farishton aur jo Musalman moujood hain un sab ko gawah bana kar kehti hon keh main apne bete Alqamah se raazi ho chuki hon.
Rasool Allah ﷺ ne farmaya: Bilal ! Us kay pas jao aur aur dekho kia wo “Laa Illah Illallah” ka qarar karne ki istitaat rakhta hai ya nahi? Mumkin hai Umme Alqamah ne mujh se haya karte hue mooh se tou keh diya ho jab’keh us ki Dili kaifiyat ye na ho”. Pas Bilal gae aur unho ne ghar kay andar se Alqamah ko “Laa Illah Illallah” kehte hue suna. Pas Bilal aae aur kaha, logo! Sun lo Alqamah ki maa ki narazi ne is ki ne us ki zaban ko Kalma e shahadat kehne se rook rakha tha aur us ki Razamandi ne us ki zaban ko us rukawat se Azad kar diya. Phir Alqamah us rouz wafaat pa gae. Rasool Allah ﷺ tashreef lae, Ap ne us kay gusul aur kafan ka hukum farmaya. Phir us ki Namaz e janaza parhi aur us ki tadfeen kay waqt moujood rahe. Phir Ap ki qabar kay kinare khare hue aur farmaya: “Muhajireen aur Ansaar kay girooh! Jo shakhs apni biwi ko apni maa par fazeelat o tarjeeh de tou us par Allah, farishton aur taman insaanon ki lanat ho. Jab tak wo Allah Azz Wajal kay Huzoor touba na kare aur us ( maa ) kay sath husn e sulooq na kare aur us ki Razamandi hasil na kare tou Allah us ka na koi farz poora qubool karta hai na nafil ( sun lo ) Allah ki Razamandi us ki Raza hai aur Allah ki narazi us ki narazi mein hai.” [1]
Pas ham Allah Hafiz se us ki Raza kay husool aur us ki narazi se bachne ki darkhuwast karte hain, kyun keh wo Sakhi Data aur Shafeeq Mehrban hai.
[1] Ibne Jouzi ne is hikayat ko mouzoaat mein zikar kiya hai aur Nojawan ( Alqamah) ka naam liya aur kaha keh faaid ya’ani Ibne Abdur Rahman Al Attar matrook hai. Aqeeli ne bataya keh us ki mutabi’at nahi ki gai aur Daood ya’ani Ibne Ibrahim Qazi Qazwain Kazzab hai.
REFERENCE:
Book: “Kabeerah Gunah”
Taleef: Shaikh Ul Islam Shams ad-Dīn adh-Dhahabī Rahimahullah.
Urdu Tarjumah: Abu Anas Muhammad Sarwar Gohar.
08. Showing Disrespect to One’s Parents
Allah, the Most High, says,
[Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but His, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them but address them in terms of honor. And, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: “My Lord! Bestow on them Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood.] (Al-Isra: 23-24)
Therefore, you should serve them as they did with you. But your service is not equal to theirs as they suffered a lot in bringing you up, hoping that you might live long. On the other hand, when you shoulder their burdens you hope that they will die soon.
Allah, the Most High, says,
[Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: To Me is thy final goal.]
(Luqman: 14)
Behold, how Allah has associated gratitude to Him with the gratitude to the parents Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him), said, “There are three verses (ayat) which have been revealed associated with three others. They are not accepted separately.
- a) Allah, the Most High, says.
[Obey Allah and Obey the Messenger. And beware (of evil) if ye do turn back, know ye that it is our Messenger’s duty to proclaim (the message in the clearest manner.]
(Al-Maidah: 92)
Thus, whoever only obeys Allah will have his obedience not accepted.
- b) [And be steadfast in prayer: Give Zakat.]
(Al-Baqarah: 43)
Hence, whoever performed prayers and does not pay Zakar will have his prayers not accepted
- c) [Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is thy final goal.)
(Luqman: 14)
Whoever shows gratitude to Allah and neglects his parents will not have his gratitude accepted. The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Allah’s satisfaction is the parent’s and His Wrath is theirs.”¹
¹Reported by At-Tirmidhi
“A man came and sought permission for Jihad (fighting in the way of Allah). The prophet (pbuh) asked him: “Are your parents living? The man said yes, Sir.” He said. Then carry on Jihad in service to your parents as this is as good as Jihad.”¹ Behold, how Allah has preferred obeying and honoring the parents to Jihad!
The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Shall I not tell you of the worst major sins? Worshipping others with Allah and showing disrespect to parents.” Again Allah associates showing disrespect to parents with worshipping others besides Him. It was related that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
“Whoever shows disrespect to his parents, he who reminds recipients of his charity to them and he who addicts to wine will not enter Paradise.”²In another tradition the Prophet (pbuh) said, “Had Allah known something concerning showing disrespect to one’s parents little than Uf (a word of contempt He would have forbidden it. Let the rebellious son do whatever he does, he will not enter Paradise, and let the obedient son do whatever he wants, he will not enter the hell-fire.”³ The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said. “May Allah curse he who shows disrespect to his parents.”⁴ “May Allah curse he who reviles his father; may Allah curse he who reviles his mother.”⁵
It was related that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, “Allah respites whatever He wants of the sins until the day of Judgment save showing disrespect to one’s parents, it will be hastened to its doer.”⁶ i.e. the worldly punishment before the Day of Judgment
Ka’b Al-Ahbar, may Allah be pleased with him, said, “Allah hastens the death of anyone who shows disrespect to his parents so as torture him. On the other hand. Allah increases one’s life span if he is kind to his parents to bless him.” Treating one’s parents with honour also requires sustaining them with the living costs when they are needy. A man came and said to the Prophet (pbuh).”O Messenger of Allah, my father asks for my property.” Then the Prophet (pbuh) said, “Both you and what you possess are your father’s.”⁷
| ¹Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim. ²Reported by Ad-Darimi, Ahmad. An-Nisa’i and Ibn Hibban ³Reported by Ad-Dailami. ⁴Reported by Al-Hakim. ⁵Reported by Imam Ahmad and An-Nisa’i. ⁶Reported by AI-Hakim. ⁷Reported by Ibn Majah and Ahmad. |
When Ka’b Al-Ahbar was asked about the meaning of showing disrespect to one’s parents, he said,
“When one’s father or mother swore an oath and he or she did not fulfill it. When they ordered him to do something but he did not obey. When they ask him for some thing and he refused. When they entrust him for something but deceives them.
Ibn ‘Abbas was asked about Ashab Al-‘Araf (men of the Heights) and he said: “As for the Heights, it is a mountain between Fire and Paradise. It is so-called because it outlooks Fire and Paradise. It is also covered by trees, fruits, rivers and wells. As for the men who seized thereon, they are those who went out to fight in the cause of Allah without their parents’ permission and then are killed. Death in the cause of Allah protects them from the Hell-Fire. But disobedience to their parents deprived them of Paradise. Thus,they will be on the Heights until Allah judges them. It was related that a man asked the Prophet (pbuh). “Who deserves my service most after Allah?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man asked again, “And who is next?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man asked further, “Who is next?” The Prophet replied, “Your mother.” The man asked once more, “And who is next?” The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Your father and then the closer kins.”¹ Thus, the Prophet (pbuh) emphasizes that the mother is the one who deserves much concern and therefore he mentioned her three times. It is the mother indeed who bears a lot in pregnancy, giving birth and suckling and constant care to the child night and day.
Once Ibn ‘Umar saw a man bearing his mother upon his shoulder and making circumambulation around the Ka’ba. The man ‘ asked him, “Do you think that I requite her? No, not even with a cry from childbirth. But, well done. Allah will give you in return for a little deed a great reward.”²
Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) related that the Prophet (pbuh) said, “There are four people who will not enter Paradise as Allah decreed: a drunkard, a usurer, he who appropriates the orphan’s property without a legal cause and he who shows disrespect to one’s parents.”³ The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, “Paradise lies beneath the feet of mothers.”⁴ A man came to Abu Ad-Darda’ and said, “O Abu Ad-Darda’, I have married a woman but my mother ordered me to divorce her.” Then Abu Ad-Darda’ said, “Parents is the middle gate of Paradise. You may either miss or preserve it.”⁵
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, “Three supplications are surely acceptable: the supplication of the oppressed, the traveler and the parents against their children.”⁶
| ¹Reported by Al-Bukhari. ²Reported by Al-Bukhari. ³Reported by Al-Hakim. ⁴It has numerous references. ⁵Reported by Ibn Majah, Ahmad and Al-Hakim. ⁶Reported by At-Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud and Ibn Majah |
An aunt is treated as a mother i. e., honorable treatment.”¹ Wahb Ibn Munabbih said. “In the tablets written by Allah to Musa is the following. O Musa! Respect your parents. Whoever respects his parents I will extend his life span and grant him a grateful progeny. But, whoever shows disrespect to his parents I will shorten his life span and grant him an ungrateful progeny,”²
Abu Bakr Ibn Abu Mariam also said, “I read in the Torah that he who hits his father will be killed.” Similarly, Wahb said, “I read in the Torah that he who slaps his father should be stoned until death.”
Amr Ibn Murrah Al-Juhanni said, “A man came to the Messenger of Allah and asked, ‘O Messenger of Allah, what do you say if/pray obligatory duties, fast during Ramadan, give due Zakat on my YI-‘ealth, and perform Hajj if I am able to do so, what is my reward?’ The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, ‘He who does this, he will be with the prophets, truthful people and the martyrs unless he disrespects his parents.”³
It was related that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, “May Allah curse he who shows disrespect to his parents.” It was narrated. Also that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
“In the night of Isra’ (Night Journey) I saw groups of people in the Hell-Fire hanged on trunks of fire. I asked, “Who are they, Gabriel?” He said, “They are those who revile their parents in this world.” Bishr said, “Whoever is intimated by his mother and listens to her speech is better than the one who fights with his sword in the cause of Allah. Gazing at her surpasses every thing. Once a man and a woman presented before the Prophet (pbuh) arguing about their child. The man said, “O Messenger of Allah, he is my child who was created from my loins (backbone).” On the other hand, the woman said, “O Messenger of Allah he bore him lightly and proceeded it out of lust. But I bore him in travail, delivered him in travail and suckled him during two full years.” Thereupon, the Prophet judged for the mother.”⁴
In the Prophet’s lifetime, there was a young man called Alqamah. He was so devout that he exerted great efforts in performing many prayers, fasting and spending money in charity. He had a fatal disease that his wife informed the Prophet (pbuh) that her husband was dying. Thereby, the Prophet (pbuh) sent `Ammar, Suhaib and Bilal to instruct the dying to say the testification of Faith. When they arrived there, they found him dying. Therefore, they began to instruct him to say there is no god but Allah, but he could not repeat it. They returned to the Prophet (pbuh) to consult him. Then, the Prophet (pbuh) said, “Did he have living parents?” They said, “He had an aged mother.” Accordingly, the Prophet asked them to bring her if she was able to walk. Otherwise he himself will go there. When being informed by the Prophet’s message, the mother said, “I sacrifice him with my soul. I will go to him.” She then went to him leaning on a staff. After greeting, the Prophet (pbuh) said; “O mother of Alqamah, tell me the truth and if you lie Allah will reveal me the truth. How was Alqamah?” She said, “He performed much prayers, fasting and spending money in charity.” Then, the Prophet (pbuh) asked, “What about you?” She said, “O Messenger of Allah! I am angry
| ¹Reported by Al-Bukhari and Abu Dawud. ²As-Sini postulated it in Ad-Dur Al-Manthur. ³Reported by Al-Haithami in Majma’ Al-Zawa’id ⁴There is no hadith similar to this statement |
REFERENCE:
BOOK: “MAJOR SINS” OF IMAM SHAMSU ED-DEEN DHAHABI.
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