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11. DAURAAN-E-NIKAAH KI BAAZ NASEEHATEIN AUR AHEM TALEEMAAT [Important Advices During Nikah]

Dauraan-e-Nikaah baaz  naseehatein aur ahem taleemaat

 

1. Dulha wa dulhan ko in alfaaz may mubarakbaad dein:

 

بَارَكَ اللَّهُ لَكَ وَبَارَكَ عَلَيْكَ وَجَمَعَ بَيْنَكُمَا فِي خَيْرٍ ‏”‏ ‏.‏

 

Baarakallaahu laka wa baaraka alaika wa jama’a bainakuma fee khair.

 

Nukta awwal: Jo tumhare huqooq hai aur jo tumhari zimmedaariyan hai Allaah dono mein barkat naazil farmaye aur nuqsaan say bachaiye.

Nukta saani: Muwafiq haalaat mein khair haasil ho, mukhaalif haalaat mein shar say mahfooz raho aur khair par dono jame raho.

(Abu Dawood (2130) Sahih by al-Albaani)

 

2. Shaadi kay maukhe par niyote ya tohfe dene ko laazmi samajhna ghalat hai, albatta khushi say jaaiz hai.

3. Ladke wale jab ladki walon kay yahan jaayein to itni taadaad mein hi jaayein kay unka isteqbaal ladki walon kay liye zehmat na ban jaaye, ladke walon ka ladki walon say is tarh ka mutalabaa karna kay hamare itne sau aadmi aayenge aur aap ko yeh yeh khane khilane honge najaaiz aur ghalat hai, iski rok thaam kay liye samaaj kay zimmedaron ko aage badh kay aana chahiye. Jahez ka mutaalaba ya dawaton ka mutaalaba agar ladki wale par bojh hai jiski wajah say wo ladki ki shaadi nahi kar paa rahe hai to yeh saraasar zulm wa haraam hai.

4. Banaao singaar ki jaaiz aur najaaiz hudood ko maloom karte huwe jaaiz tareeqa ikhtiyaar kiya jaaye. Wuzoo aur namaz say rokne wale banaao singaar say bhi bachein aur behayai say bachein.

5. Be pardagi aur behayai say bachein.

6. Dawat-e-valima may shareek hazraat ki daawat karne wale kay liye duaa:

 

‏ اللَّهُمَّ بَارِكْ لَهُمْ فِي مَا رَزَقْتَهُمْ وَاغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَارْحَمْهُمْ ‏”‏ ‏.

 

Allaahumma, baarik lahum fee maa razaqtahum, waghfir lahum war hamhum.

 

Tarjamah: “Allaah barkat day inki rozi may aur baqsh day inko aur raham kare inpar.”

(Sahih Muslim: 2042)

 

 
Allahumma at’im man at’amani, vaskhi man askhaani.

 

Tarjamah: “Aye Allaah khila usko jisne mujhe khilaya aur pila usko jisne mujhe pilaya.”

(Sahih Muslim: 2055)

 

 
“‏ أَفْطَرَ عِنْدَكُمُ الصَّائِمُونَ وَأَكَلَ طَعَامَكُمُ الأَبْرَارُ وَصَلَّتْ عَلَيْكُمُ الْمَلاَئِكَةُ ‏”‏ ‏.‏

 

Aftara indakumus saaimoon, wa akala ta’amakumul abraar, va sallat alaikumul malaaikah.

 

Tarjamah: “Tumhare paas rozedaar iftaar kiya karein, nek log tumhara khana khayein aur farishte tumhare liye duaaein kare.”

(Abu Dawood: 3854)

 

7. Istitaat may rahkar valima karna aur mehr kam say kam rakhna khair ka kaam hai.

(Sahih ul Jaami: 3300)

 

8. Aaj kay daur may nikaah lakhon mein ho raha hai jabke asal mein mehr ki mukhtasar si raqam aur valime ki mukhtasar si ziyafat chand sau rupayon mein ho jati hai.

9. Jahan sab log jama ho sakte ho, wahan nikaah kiya jaa sakta hai, chahe woh masjid ho ya ghair masjid.

10. Palkon kay baal ukhaadna jaaiz nahi, siwaaye uske kay nafrat aamez ya muheeb lag rahe ho ya zarar rasan ho to ilaaj ki niyyat say itna kaate kay aib aur zarar door ho jaaye.

(Ibn Baaz)

 

11.Chaalees yaum say zyada naakhun ya baal na badhayein.

(Muslim: 258)

 

12. Aurat ka ghungroo baandhna jaaiz nahi.

(Surah al-Noor: 31)

 

13. Kaale rang kay khizaab say bachna chahiye.

(Muslim: 2102)

 

14. Dhoka khiyanat say har marhale mai bachein.

(Muslim: 102)

 

15. Mard kay liye chandi ki anghooti pehanna jaaiz hai.

(Musnad Ahmad: 6518)

 

16. Mard kay liye surma lagaana jaaiz hai.

(Silsilah al-Sahihah: 633)

 

17. Mehr-e-muajjal (baad may) ki bhi ijaazat hai, lekin mehr-e-mu’ajjal (fauran) ada karne par ubhaara jaaye.

 (Bukhari: 5126)

 

18. Aurat apna mehr maaf bhi kar sakti hai.

(Surah al-Nisaa:3)

 

19. Hukumati rasmi aur qaanooni kaarwayi/likhaayi padhayi mazboot tareeqe say farma lein, isme susti aur kaaheli na karein aur dastawezaat sambhaal kar rakhein.

(Surah al-Baqarah: 282/ Surah  al-Mayidah: 1)

 

20. Aqd-e-nikaah aur ruqsati mein waqt ki mohlat day sakte hain.

21. Deeni kufoo ka khayal rakha jaaye. Isi liye Muslim ladki ghair Muslim say nikaah na kare aur Muslim mard ghair kitaabiyah say nikaah na kare. Iski roushni may bay namaazi aur bad deen wa bad kirdaar say parhez karein.

Note: Kufoo kay naam par biraadari waad, tabqaanti, qabaaeli, zabani, alaqai, nasli imtiyazaat aur asbiyat ka rang dena haraam hai.

(Surah Hujuraat: 13)

 

22. Wo aib jo izdiwaji taluqaat kay liye rukawat hon aur isi tarah wo gambheer beemariyan jo mutaa’di ho na chupaye jaayein balke  “quuluu qawlan-sadeedaa”     par amal kiya jaaye aur ahle ilm say mashwarah liya jaaye.

(Majmoo al Fatawa: 32/61)

 

23. Mehr ki khaleel aur kasrat miqdaar shariat nay muta’ayyan nahi ki, jo bhi razamandi say tai paaye jaaiz hai, albatta kam mehr barkat ki zamaanat hai.

(As Sahiha of Allama Albani: 1842)

 

REFERNCE:
BOOK: “NIKAH SE MUTALIQ AHEM MALOOMAT”
BY: SHEIKH ARSHAD BASHEER UMARI MADANI
Halala Islam Ki Nazar Mein Kya Hai? | Islam Ka Khandaani Nizaam Ep 05 | Sk Alimuddin Madani

Some Important Advice (During Nikaah)

1. One should congratulate the bride and the bride groom in the following words:

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that when a man got married he would congratulate him and pray for him, saying: “May Allaah bless you and bring blessings upon you and bring you together in goodness.”

“‏ بَارَكَ اللَّهُ لَكَ وَبَارَكَ عَلَيْكَ وَجَمَعَ بَيْنَكُمَا فِي خَيْرٍ ‏”‏ ‏.‏

Explanation and Meaning of Duaa:

(i) May Allaah grant barakah in your rights and responsibilities and May Allaah protect you from harm.

(ii) May Allaah grant you goodness in prosperous circumstances and May Allaah protect you from harm in unfortunate circumstances. May Allaah enjoin both of you upon goodness in all the circumstances.

[Narrated by Abu Dawood (2130) and classed as Sahih by al-Albaani]

2. Gifting on marriages is allowed but not obligatory. Considering it is an obligation is incorrect.

3. The family members of the bridegroom should go to the bride’s home with an appropriate number of relatives. Unfortunately, we see now-a-days that the bridegroom’s family comes with hundreds of people and demands variety of foods in hostages; this becomes a burden on the bride’s family. If marriages don’t happen due to these obstacles, this is Haraam and oppression on the bride’s family.

4. Beautifying and decorating oneself is allowed but in the prescribed limits of the Shariah. The cosmetic which prevents us from performing ablution for the prayer shouldn’t be used.

5. We should abstain from immodesty and shamelessness.

6. The attendees of the Valimah should pray in the following words:

‏ اللَّهُمَّ بَارِكْ لَهُمْ فِي مَا رَزَقْتَهُمْ وَاغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَارْحَمْهُمْ ‏”‏ ‏.

“O Allaah! Bless them in what you have provided them as sustenance; and forgive them and have mercy upon them”

(Muslim: 2042)

Allahumma at’im man at’amani, vaskhi man askhaani.

“O Allaah! Feed him who fed me and give drink to him who provided me drink”.

(Muslim: 2055)

“‏ أَفْطَرَ عِنْدَكُمُ الصَّائِمُونَ وَأَكَلَ طَعَامَكُمُ الأَبْرَارُ وَصَلَّتْ عَلَيْكُمُ الْمَلاَئِكَةُ ‏”‏ ‏.‏

“May the fasting (men) break their fast with you, and the pious eat your food, and the angels pray for blessing on you”.

(Abu Dawood: 3854)

7. Performing Valimah by being in our limits and paying less Mahr is recommended.

(Sahih ul Jaami: 3300)

8. Now a days, Valimah and mahr is carried out in terms of lakhs. However, if we follow Shariah, we can carry it out in terms of hundreds.

9. Nikaah can be performed in a place where we can hold a congregation. So, we can perform it in mosque (or) any other place.

10. It is not permissible to shave the eyebrows or reduce them, because that is the nams (plucking) for which the Prophet (PBUH) cursed the one who does it and the one who asks for it to be done. However, reducing it for a valid reason such as for any medical purpose or removing any defect etc… is permissible.

(Ibn Baaz)

11. The nails and hair must be cut within forty days. (of the last cutting)

(Muslim: 258)

12. In presence of gair mahram anklet bells are not allowed in Islam.

(Surah al-Noor: 31)

13. Dyeing the grey hair black is impermissible however any other colour can be used.

(Muslim: 2102)

14. We should abstain from cheating and treachery.

(Muslim: 102)

15. It is permissible for men to wear silver ring.

(Musnad Ahmad: 6518)

16. It is permissible for men to use kohl for eyes.

(Silsilah al-Sahihah: 633)

17. Mahr-e-muajjal )مؤجل( is  allowed but Mua’jjal )معجل( is appreciated.

It is permissible to delay the payment of Mahr-e-Muajjal. However, the Islamic Shari’ah encouraged to pay it as soon as possible.

 (Bukhari: 5126)

18. A woman can lay off (excuse)her mahr.

(Surah al-Nisaa:3)

19. All the legal documents of marriage must be applied and taken as soon as possible.

(Surah al-Baqarah: 282/ Surah  al-Mayidah: 1)

20. There can be interval between Nikaah and farewell.

21. One should consider the religious suitability. A Muslim man should not marry a non Muslim woman except the women of the people of the book and a Muslim woman should not marry a non Muslim man.

Similarly, one should not marry an individual who abandons Salah, who does not practises religion and possesses an ill character.

Note: Adding parameters such as family status, linguistic basis, regional background, tribal origin, lineage etc… in the name of religious suitability is absolutely forbidden.

(Surah Hujuraat: 13)

22. One must refrain from hiding the defects which can cause harm to the marital life.

(Majmoo al Fatawa: 32/61)

23. Maximum and minimum Mahr is not fixed in the Shariah. However, there is a guarantee of blessings in the minimum mahr. 

(As Sahiha of Allama Albani: 1842)

REFERENCE:
BOOK: “CRUCIAL INFORMATION RELATED TO NIKAH”
BY: SHEIKH ARSHAD BASHEER UMARI MADANI
Iddat Mein Nikah Ka Sharayi Hukm | Islam Ka Khandaani Nizaam Ep 07 | Shaikh Alimuddin Madani
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